While he was driving he was asked who should be saved if they had to make that decision - his daughter or his fiancé.

They rang an ambulance and my son and I got rushed to hospital where I found out he had pneumonia in both lungs.

I didn't want to go through the same thing as I did with our first son. I felt more comfortable at home and supported, surrounded by my family while giving birth.

So here I am again, writing; to help process what we are experiencing as we head into birthing in a pandemic, and for other birthing persons out there, in the same situation of Deja Vu, to realise you are not alone.

All I wanted was to be awake and aware, and able to latch her, and have that important skin to skin within the first thirty minutes.

After all the checks had been done we were told to go home, 3.5 hours after his birth.

I was rolled into theatre just crying.

I hoped my heart could find peace

We picked rose petals for my water birth

Their innocence brings me a sense of peace

It was now obvious our baby was in a breech position

Beautiful words from a mama back at work

I spent the entire weekend on my own in tears in hospital

It began as weird “episodes” where I just felt off